What advice would you give to your teenage self?

That’s a tough one! See, I know me. Teenage Sami was convinced she knew everything and would most likely laugh and ignore any attempt to tell her different.

On one hand teenage me did have a pretty good idea of what she wanted out of life and was still young and hopeful. Life hadn’t made her bitter and jaded yet. In some ways I had a better grasp on reality then the 42 yr old me. Plus I wouldn’t want to change too much or I could end up never learning those lessons that can’t be taught, that have to be experienced to understand.

On the other hand, there’s certain things that I wish someone had given me a heads up on. Decisions that led to even worse decisions. People that I would have been better off never knowing, not just boyfriends either! Different friends and various coworkers that were just toxic and did nothing but hurt and betray my trust.

But if I were allowed to sit down with my 15 year old self here’s the most important things I would try to beat in my stubborn ass brain.

  • Trust yourself and that little voice inside your head. Most the time the truth was obvious and you ignored your instincts. You overanalyzed the situation and convinced yourself to believe the lie because you wanted to. Prime example, the one who first broke our heart. We found the letter, we already suspected that he was lying. We believed the lie because it was better than facing the truth. That is one mistake that had possibly life long repercussions.
  • Sometimes your friends were your worst enemies. Their behavior and actions did reflect on you. Though you did plenty to earn that bad girl reputation, some of the girls you trusted the most were the first to talk shit or sleep with your boyfriends and guys you liked. You were judged and subject to guilt by association. Despite your love, loyalty and going out of your way to help them, they still stabbed you in the back. Prettt much everyone but our sister and someone you least expected was the most spiteful of all for something you never even knew was a problem. Never underestimate jealousy and insecurity, they can cause some of the worst problems of all.
  • Stop letting your insecurities and fears of rejection rule your life. You constantly compared yourself to other people and didn’t really believe for years that you were ever attractive. You used sex to help increase popularity and believed that was all you deserved. If you had accepted the person you were and not played the part that was expected and you weren’t so determined to be different you would have realized a lot sooner that you were actually pretty fucking awesome without having to go to extremes by dying your hair black or sleeping with the first guy to pay attention.
  • There is so much more I could warn you about, people who hurt us, people who ended up becoming our best friends, the various guys to stay away from, the mistakes you made with ones you loved, the ones you hurt. But I think if you listen to at least half the advice above maybe you’ll do a better job of the whole adulthood thing than I did.
  • One last thing. In about a year we’re going to hook up with someone pretty unexpected. For some reason, he’s still hanging around some 25 years later. Yes, we are *that damn good* 😉 but for some reason we actually love him. I know, I certainly didn’t expect him of all ppl either. To spare you a lot of the pain and endless hours of wondering… No, you will never understand why it was him anymore than you understand him at times. Just don’t worry about it, tell him you love him and see what happens. Rejection is better than no answer at all.
  • PS: you will always look way better blonde!

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